Even the stoplights are against me. This week I have really felt like the universe is against my whole family. Even this morning on my way to work it was like icing on the cake. I come the back way to work and the stoplight I come into town on didn’t even turn green for 2 whole cycles. Everyone else around me got to go while I sat and waited. That is not a good way to start a Monday morning. Ray’s job is still making me a little crazy. He isn’t making much money, which we knew would be the case for January, but some of the so called men he works with are so mean and creepy. Jerika is struggling with one of her friends and I think it might be best to not even go into detail on that one, but I really hate to watch people kick my child after they push her down and this isn’t the first time. That kid and her forgiving nature. She did however get a job at the nursing home in St. Anthony part time as a nurse’s assistant and she is pretty excited about that. Also, while struggling to make ends meet at this point in our lives, I have noticed that people are posting pictures on facebook about travelling the world and they are on government assistance. I think Kinlee is doing pretty good right now other than the fact that she went to her friends the other night and I told her should only go if her room was clean. She took a strategic picture of her room that kind of left out the mess and sent it to me via text because I was busy downstairs. It looked clean enough for me to let her go and then I actually went upstairs after she left and is was a disaster. Needless to say she isn’t going anywhere fun for a while. Which is good because I got a text from her at school today and she is fighting with one of her friends. I don’t know what it is with my kids and their friends, maybe I need to pick their friends for them. I am not saying they are perfect and easy to get along with, but it just seems like enough already. Toxic friendships, that is what it seems like lately, Jerika’s so call friend unfriended all of us from facebook today. Wow, I think I am more hurt than anything, we treated that girl like one of our own and now she is just signing all of us off because of jealousy. So sad. I know I am kind of being a debby downer and I know life could be worse, but right not this is what it is and I don’t know how to get out of my depressed funk. I don’t know if making enough money to actually pay the bills is going to make me feel better, I know it will help, but I need to do something to snap out of this. On a positive note, things seem to be picking up at work so hopefully we won’t have our hours cut this year. And keeping busy at work helps keep my mind off some of the other crazy things. I guess there is some kind of lesson in this trial and I don’t know what I am supposed to learn from it, but I don’t like it and I am ready for some sort or normal again in my life.
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